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Hilary Says: Welcome to my blog, view it, enjoy it, tag it, come back again.

Whisper
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Breakdown

Had a breakdown at home yesterday, the aftermath was total fatigue and a terrible headache that i can't even face the next day(weak, i know). It was a great thing that kept everything until i reached home. It was simply too much for me to handle. Okay, lets say that my SYF is finally over. I broke down not only because the chinese orchestra got a silver. After the SYF, i have to study for the Mid year examinations. I have no confidence in passing all the subjects. Not even english. I feel like just screaming. On top of that, my sprained finger decreases my efficiency doing my homework. I have to take double the time to do my homework. My homework consists of mostly essays and essays. I have a lack of time to complete all these and my handphone is giving me tons of problems. I am losing my contacts again and again and AGAIN. There's problems with the phone itself. I really think that i took the faulty phone because there's problems when i get the phone. Piano exams are approaching way too soon already, i can't practice. I really can't. I just feel useless and moodless to continue studying. I'm experiencing many emotions now.

I feel much better now :D

Anyway, the chinese orchestra got a silver. I think it is a total failure. We're screwed up. After four years of practicing and sacrifice, we got this results. After skipping many lessons that were actually even more important, we got this results. After putting in tremendous efforts , we got this results. I feel that it was just one mistake that screwed the whole thing up. I really do not know what is the mistake but i feel indifferent about it. We're a team, so anyone's mistake in the orchestra is our mistake. However, what's done is done already. Let it be.